Mind Over Sports » Hockey

IF YOU’RE AN ATHLETE, REMEMBER: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS LUCK.

mindoversports — Sat, 26 May 2012 23:33:32 +0000

“Depend on the rabbit’s foot if you will but remember, it didn’t work for the rabbit.” R. E. Shay

There is no such thing as luck. Good or bad. Yet how often we’ve heard others comment about another person’s good fortune saying “Wow, he (or she) is really lucky.” But the fact of the matter is that we create what happens to us in or lives, both good and bad, based on our own feelings of self-worth (our inner-self) and whether or not our lives are in harmony.

People who were fortunate enough to be born into a family where there was much love and nurturing have the basic foundation that is so important when they travel their life’s road, because self-esteem is the foundation for all human behavior. We act, or refuse to act, based on how we feel about ourselves. We take risks, or don’t take risks, based on how we feel about ourselves.

People with a high sense of self-worth are the same people who are successful, healthy and happy. But those who were unfortunate enough to be born into a dysfunctional family where there was very little love and affection are the same people who experience great hardship in their lives and are generally unhappy and unhealthy. This often reveals itself in the form of obesity, heavy drinking, heavy smoking, misdirected anger and poor eye contact. And these are the people who are uncomfortable being happy. When they find themselves experiencing happiness they will often do something disruptive to negatively affect a relationship.

But it’s important to remember, however, that even if you might have been born into a dysfunctional family environment, your life can change dramatically when you encounter a partner or someone in your life who loves you unconditionally. It could be a professor, a teacher, a coach, a close friend or a spouse. Especially, a spouse or a significant other. Or it could come about as a result of intense counseling and therapy.

We see things as we are. Not as they are, but as we are. People who have a high sense of inner-self see their world from a different perspective than those with a low sense of inner-self. They see the glass half-full rather than half-empty. And because of their positive attitude, they create positive events in their lives. But you can’t fake this and say, “I’m going to start being more positive.” Either you are, or you’re not.

And it’s important to remember that people reflect us. If we want to know how we’re showing up in the world, all we have to do is look at those around us. There’s a famous Hebrew proverb that says: “Liars believe everyone around them are lying.”

I’m reminded of an old Hassidic tale where a couple moves into a new village and asks the local rabbi: “Rabbi, what are the people like in this village?” And the rabbi says: “Before I answer that question, tell me what the people were like in the village you just moved from.” And they reply: “Oh, they were very nasty and backbiting and told lies about us behind our backs.” And the rabbi thoughtfully strokes his large black beard and responds: “Well, I think you’ll find the people here in this village about the same.” The next day, another couple moves into the same village and they too visit the rabbi and ask: “Rabbi, what are the people like here in this village?” And he says: “Before I answer tell me what the people were like in the village you just moved from.” And they say: “Oh, the people there were very nice and very loving, they were always helpful and treated us wonderfully.” And once again the rabbi strokes his beard and responds: “I think you’ll find the people here in this village about the same.”

I’ve had numerous conversations with others who look forward to growing old but only if they are in good health. They act as if there is some outside power that’s going to help them be healthy, as though it’s in the hands of providence, not realizing that the life-style they create for themselves when they are younger shows up when they are older. If someone thirty begins a program of physical fitness and doesn’t abuse alcohol or drugs, they will be healthy as they reach old age. But those who mistreat their bodies and abuse drugs and alcohol are destined to be in ill health later in life. Assuming they live that long. That’s why professional counseling can be so important. Especially support groups.

HOW SELF-ESTEEM AFFECTS PERFORMANCE.

mindoversports — Sun, 06 May 2012 21:37:46 +0000

Someone recently asked me what I did for a living and I told them I was a writer. When they asked what I wrote about I said: “Self-esteem and how it affects performance in both positive and negative ways.” They wanted to know more so I explained to them, for example, that if you were an athlete (or a corporate executive) and you are “withholding” – that is, keeping your feelings and emotions bottled-up inside yourself – it impacts how you feel about yourself. Withholding is a form of lying that demeans us and lowers our self-esteem, creating psychological baggage that affects our ability to focus and process information.
And because “we see things as we are,” when we withhold, we begin to think negatively and see the world around us from a negative perspective. We create a negative self-image cycle and begin to create negative events in our lives that not only affect our performance, but also our health.
But if we don’t withhold, if we are honest with our feelings and emotions, we will create a positive self-image cycle and begin to create positive events in our lives.
If you are reading this and would like to have a complimentary copy of an e-book I’ve written entitled “Mind Over Sports. The Relationship of Self-Esteem to Athletic Performance” send me an e-mail and I’ll send you a copy. The book is for athletes, coaches and parents. My e-mail address appears on the upper right side of this website. But in case you can’t find it, it’s marv@mindoversports.com.

WHY DO SO MANY PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES DECLARE BANKRUPTCY SHORTLY AFTER RETIRING?

mindoversports — Wed, 02 May 2012 22:11:51 +0000

This is a question often raised and the answer is pretty simple. They don’t have a Bobby Brett to handle their finances, as he did for his brother George. When George was playing for the Kansas City Royals, I lived in Kansas City and owned an advertising agency and on occasion hired George to do commercials for my clients. And in order to get that accomplished, I had to go through Bobby, who was his financial adviser and confident. Bobby was a tough person to deal with but he was always straight forward with me and was always truthful. And I believe it was because of his diligence in handling George’s cash flow that helped George to be as successful as he was. When he came to bat, he never worried about his finances because he knew he had Bobby in his corner. Today, both are multi-millionaires and own a couple of minor league baseball franchises in the northwest United States.

It’s too bad Warren Sapp, Michael Vick, Mike Tyson, Johnny Unitas, Bjorn Borg and Mark Brunell didn’t have a Bobby in their corner. It’s been estimated that 78% of all NFL players will declare bankruptcy or face joblessness and divorce a mere two years after they finish their careers.

Citing the rate at which pro athletes declare bankruptcy after their professional careers end, former Major League Baseball player Doug Glanville wrote in one of his magazine columns that the problem lies with the speed at which the money comes in. He advises strong financial and life planning for athletes to avoid money woes after the playing stops. And I advise that they find someone like Bobby to cover their backs.

COACHES WHO EXCESSIVELY YELL AT REFS DURING COMPETITION ARE PROVIDING THEIR PLAYERS WITH A JUSTIFICATION FOR LOSING.

mindoversports — Fri, 27 Apr 2012 01:05:20 +0000

It’s not bad when a coach speaks up for his or her team during competition when a bad call is made by a referee, but when this behavior is carried to excess, it provides the team with a justification for losing. (“The ref ****** us.”) Coaches need to control their tempers and be cautious when criticizing refs during games. And those coaches who are unable to control their tempers more than likely have an issue or issues in their personal lives that are affecting their behavior in public. They need to get counseling and get their personal lives in order.

THE RELATIONSHIP OF THE CONSUMPTION OF ALCOHOL TO SPORTS INJURIES.

mindoversports — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 16:25:41 +0000

I recently had an opportunity to interview Dr. Tommy Burnett who spent 40 years as a professor at Missouri State University. Dr. Burnett has a PhD in Sport Psychology and is also an expert in Sports Law and Risk Management. He told me that when athletes exercise, the oxygen goes to the muscles first. But alcohol interferes with the oxygen supply making an athlete susceptible to injury. The consumption of alcohol interferes with the transportation of oxygen to the body’s muscle cells and is not being delivered to the ligaments and tendons. When the muscle fibers are deprived of oxygen, the athlete is more prone to injuries. Especially joint injuries. This is pretty common knowledge among personal trainers who work on professional athletes but it’s a fact often hidden from public view since there is a close association of the marketing of alcoholic beverages and sports, especially professional sports. So when you read where an athlete is experiencing muscle and ligament problems, there’s a possibility that particular athlete is also consuming substantial amounts of alcohol in his or her personal life.